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For most of my life my morning routine has looked exactly the same. Isn’t that impressive? That’s the kind of habit-building, dependable morning person I am. Every day I do the exact same thing and slowly my neural pathways have formed so that I don’t even have to think about it anymore–it just is.

What does that look like in practice, you ask?

Well, I set the alarm for as close to oversleeping as possible, and then I still hit the snooze button about six times until the growing sense of panic that I’m actually about to fall back asleep sweeps over me from head to toe and then I finally, groggily throw back the covers, shuffle into the bathroom, grimace at my reflection, brush my teeth, and barely make it to wherever I’m going on time.

(Oh. Maybe I should have left that first paragraph alone and not included that last one…)

OKAY, but I’m trying to have healthier sleep habits. I realized I needed them when I was watching YouTube videos one night while in bed and I fell asleep and then woke up when I dropped my phone on my face. That’s the kind of situation where you think, “Wow, maybe I should switch from James Corden videos to a glass of warm milk?”

(But not really because warm milk is gross. (Sorry, Mom.) )

In my pursuit of healthier habits, I have realized a few things.

  1. It’s hard to have healthier habits.
  2. There are so many habits that NEED to be healthier that I need a bag of chips to cope with the overwhelming nature of it all. And maybe ice cream.
  3. It’s easy to beat myself up over the fact that I haven’t immediately changed every bad habit into a good one.
  4. And that is why I can reward myself with ice cream.
  5. Wait. I think I missed something.

Changing habits is hard! But I am trying. I’m trying to put my phone away an hour or so before bed. I’ve found the perfect way to do it, too. Want some insider tips? Okay. So you just put your phone like two inches further than you can reach, and if you’re super lazy once you get into bed and don’t like getting up…you’re golden.

TANGENT: (I know what you’re thinking…this entire post is just a bunch of tangents, and you would be right.) Last week I couldn’t find my glasses, so I decided to do a bunch of work without them and gave myself a headache, and it turns out they were about three feet away from me the whole time. This is the kind of behavior that is unacceptable and an unhealthy habit that I will definitely add to my list of things to think about changing.

TANGENT FROM TANGENT: (I know.) My friend E. was telling me that the Apple Watch wants you to stand for one minute each hour for 12 hours. I was like, “Can you just stand for 12 consecutive minutes and then sit the rest of the day?” And the answer is no, apparently.

Anyway. Where did I leave off? Oh yeah. I’m trying. I’m putting my phone away and doing Crossword Puzzles until–instead of a phone–I drop a Will Shortz book on my head. And in the mornings, I am getting up at the same time and making a cup of tea and sitting in my studio while scrolling through celebrity news on Instagram thoughtfully making a list about what I want to accomplish that day. And one of those things is writing on this blog.

So, hello!

Tell me about your morning routine or evening routine or your lack of routine or how much you also love Annie’s Mac ‘n’ Cheese in the comments.

Note: This post was originally published in 2019 on my previous blog.

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